Picking which direction to go (or which therapist to see) can be overwhelming. Depending on where you live and what you're looking for, it may seem like there are too many options, or it may seem like there aren't near enough! So, how do you choose the right one? And how do you know that you have?
If you're like me, you have probably come across a few therapists who you know are definitely not right for you. Unfortunately, it's a lot harder to know which therapist is the right one for you.
There are a few reasons why it is so hard to choose a therapist:
Because of the confidential nature of therapy, reviews are not common. Not everyone wants to share that they attended therapy, even if they loved their therapist and want others to know that. And, some therapists don't even allow for reviews because they want to make sure that their clients' confidentiality is protected to the greatest extent possible.
Even if you have tons of information about a therapist, you may not know what you need yet. Especially if you don't have prior experience with therapy, you may not know what works for you and what doesn't.
Not all therapists curate a website that is representative of them and the work they can do. Some may not even have much of a website at all.
Besides browsing websites (if they're available and provide enough information), you can also:
Ask around for referrals, if you're comfortable doing so. You might ask friends whom you know have gone to therapy, or you might ask leaders in your community (like a priest if you attend synagogue, or even your yoga instructor if you join flows). You may ask on an anonymous social media site, like the Reddit subreddit for your town or city.
Call and email the therapists you're considering. Even a little bit of direct communication with someone can help you figure out whether you're going to vibe.
Once you've chosen a therapist and you've scheduled the first session, you may start to feel nervous because you're wondering whether you made the right decision. I have some good news for you and some bad news.
The bad news? Before that first session (and maybe even a few after that), you can't be sure that you have chosen the right therapist.
The good news? That's okay. Part of the work in those early sessions is figuring out whether you and your therapist are a good fit. Like any relationship, it may take more than a few meetings to really connect. But, if you realize that your therapist is not the right therapist for you, you don't have to keep seeing them. You can and should start looking for a new therapist. That said, it can definitely be a frustrating process to begin again.
For me, it all comes down to this: You have already empowered yourself by seeking out therapy. Keep empowering yourself by finding the right therapist!